Lately I have been noticing how sharp my tongue is, and even when I don’t actually say something, I am shocked at the things I think about people. I forget to think about the good things in people and go straight for the bad. I don’t think that I was always like this, but lately I have just been very cynical, and well, just mean. I don’t like it at all. I don’t want to be known as someone who gossips. I have also been getting irritated with people really easily, and I don’t want that either. So, since noticing this, my prayer has been to see people the way God sees them. I have been on my knees asking Him to show me what it is like to look at certain people through His eyes. It’s really been cool to see God make a change in my heart. Like today for example, I started thinking about a specific person and how annoying that I think they are (they are probably really not that annoying, but in my mind this morning, they were). I caught myself doing this and asked God, “What is it like?” “What does she look like through your eyes?” “What do you see when you look at her?” “What am I missing?” I was SHOCKED at the image I got. It was the image of a completely broken person, looking totally dejected. This person who acts so confidant and happy, was so downcast and sad. It was a really big reality check for me. So then my prayer became, God, teach me what it is to love her like you do. I not only want to love her, I want to like her. God doesn’t just love me, he actually likes me too, and I want to know what that is to be that towards other people. I don’t know if that image was something I made up on the spot today, or if God put that in my mind, I honestly think it was the latter, but it caught me off guard, and I really needed that. So the next time you want to say something nasty about someone, or even when you are thinking it instead of just saying it, try asking sincerely, “What does that person look like through your eyes, Lord?” You might be surprised.
I really need to get better about blogging. This one time a week thing isn’t going to cut it! But I do have something great to write about today! For those of you that have not seen the movie End of the Spear, you really need to! I saw it last night with my friend Suzanne and we absolutely loved it! It tugged at my heart in ways that a movie never has before. It is amazing to see the things that the team Jim Elliot was involved with did in the jungles of Ecuador. They made contact with a people group, despite everything people said, and that sacrifice lives on today in that same jungle. It was really cool to see the way that they adapted Jesus’ message to fit with the culture of this people group. I also HIGHLY recommend the book “Bruchko” by Bruce Olson for those of you that are interested in missionaries being successful in indigenous tribes. That is also a fascinating story. For those of you that have seen this movie or read that book, I would love to hear what you think, even if you disagree!
Well I did it! I made it 4 days in a row getting up at 4:30 AM to go to the gym with my dad! I would have gone 5, but we had the day off of school on Monday, and who would get up at 4:30 AM on their day off? Not me! It has definitely been hard getting up, but once I’m there, and once I’m done, I’m always glad that I did it. My body doesn’t feel as sluggish. And 4:30 isn’t that bad when you get to take two naps (one on each MARTA ride!)! But I’m not gonna lie, I have been extra tired these last couple of weeks, so today, after I got home from my Spanish lesson (since I don’t work on Fridays) I took a nap. 4 hours later I woke up! I guess I really needed it! I couldn’t believe it was 5 already! Tonight I should be wide awake, so I guess I can do the homework that I meant to do during the day! HaHa! So I know this entry isn’t that interesting, and definitely not anywhere close to deep, but hey, this was my life this week! I will try to be a little more interesting next time!
Today at church they did this song that really struck a chord with me. I think that Casting Crowns sings it, but I’m not positive. Anyway, the song is about someone sitting in church wondering if they are the only one that struggles, because everyone around them looks so strong. Below is the chorus, but I recommend checking out the whole song if you get a chance. You can find it on itunes.
Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade
For three days I am hanging out with my friend Maggie. She is 3 years old and is staying with me at my house while her parents are up at the Passion Conference. Every Wednesday I go hang out with my sister and my niece and on my way up there I stop at Ricky’s grave (for those of you reading that don’t know who Ricky is, he is a very good friend of mine, and Maggie’s, who died in September from Leukemia). Today since Maggie was with me, she came too. Before we went we had to go to the grocery store to pick up a few things and while we were there she picked out a little pot of pink flowers for Ricky. It was so sweet as she placed the pot, then watered it with a water bottle that I had in the car. After she was done she knelt down and was looking closely at the picture on Rick’s grave marker asking me, “Where did Ricky go?” “Why did he have to go to Heaven?” “Why did his body get sick?” “Why did Jesus want him to come live with Him?” Those are tough questions to answer, but it was amazing the simple answers that God placed on my heart to help Maggie understand. I was afraid she might be a little upset by it, but it seemed to make complete sense to her. Children have the clearest understanding of God that I have ever seen! I am really glad that we went up there today. Somehow that experience was very calming to my heart.
On Sunday Leah and I headed up to Nashville to help set up for the Passion06 Conference. We stuffed 20,000 packets and then on Monday, we both manned computers with 28 other people and checked in over 18,000 college students and leaders! It was amazing to see all of them come through, so excited for what God was about to do in their midst! If you don’t know anything about this amazing ministry, you can check it out at www.passion06.com The first session went great last night as well as the community groups. These students have overtaken Nashville and will be there until the 5th. I came home today so that I can get back to work, but Leah is enjoying the rest of the conference as a student instead of a volunteer like last year. It was a great adventure for me though! I can’t wait to hear the stories from people that were able to attend the whole conference! Please be praying for them over the next couple of days!